Good: Reminds me of Rez from Gex: Enter the Gecko (PS1). It's an interesting effect. I hear no recording noise or artifacts and the effect seems to apply well.
Bad: Either your S's (and x's) are too long or you ended up with some strange hissing in the recording, I can't tell which; but I think it's your effect not working the same on the s sound.
Also your emphasis on some of the words is a bit -too- over the top: I, DIE, NOW. Inversely some of your dialogue is almost impossible to understand because it's too quiet compared to the echoing/reverb of other words; in other words your dynamics need to be tighter.
Also, 'taking you with me' feels too fast...and nothing after that line is intelligible at all.
I like your effects/editing but your actual voice work, pacing, dynamics etc. can definitely use work.
Bad: Sounds like you are speaking too closely to the microphone without a pop filter. Getting some hard pops on the b's and p's and a bit of air noise on the h's and f's.
I don't personally like your accent and feel like you should work on either fake accents for 'goofy' voice work or the more 'plain' midwest accent used by US news...or the BBC British accent if you prefer (UK News).
Good: Solid signal to noise ratio and relatively complete recording; you seem to have good equipment and know how to use it. Interesting script.
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